Nobody's Dead

The Dying Process experienced as a friend

The dying process is one thing to write about and another to experience emotionally with a friend.  I spent several hours this morning in the cancer ward with someone I used to love very much.  I thought I was long over him. He's doing great! I had all I could do to contain myself.

It seems to me that watching our loved ones in the process of dying, often is more painful than the trip itself.  It's a replay of life. A replay of the love we tried so hard to maintain. A sense of the failure of having a deep connection with another and having it obscured, in retrospect, by what seem like trivial matters. Would it matter today if he had other girlfriends?  Would it matter today that he didn't know how to express love to his children? Would it matter today that he didn't seem to want to be with me, with us? Even saying this seems to smooth me out. The answer is still, "Yes, but..."  The "but" is our time together was too painful for me to endure.  The change is in my forgiveness and the acceptance of life moving on.

It's as if a piece of machinery has tunneled its way into my innards and looked at my part in what went wrong, what I could have overlooked and didn't.  Maybe this all has to do with getting older.  It reminded me of watching my sweet Dad after his stroke, rigid in his bed, and my Mom, putting lipstick on after ten hours of surgery to remove tumors on her diminutive body.  

Here's what my Angels are saying.  You asked about the dying process.  The process for the one experiencing dying need not be difficult. The challenge is always with the separation of the non-existent past and the non-existent future from the present.

If you can only be present, you will see that your loved one is fine right now.  He is dealing with his life as it is.  See him as the angel he was when you met him and when you chose to spend your lives together. That time was aborted because of his behavior and you being too vulnerable and needy to create change without leaving. He taught you how to succeed on your own.  Without his apparent lack of love, you would not have taken the risks that you did, and succeeded. You would never have left the home fires to experience the challenge of climbing your own Mount Everest.  

It's all about forgiveness - forgiveness of my partner for his behavior. And maybe more important, forgiveness of myself for not being of high enough consciousness to let go and not maintain an anger I thought was long over.  Now I am left only with sadness and a forgiveness that brings tears to my eyes.

 

The Dying Process - continued

The dying process is not scary within itself, it's just the idea of it that scares us. I can scare myself in a strange airport, wondering why I left my watch home? Am I at the right gate?  Will I make my connection or miss it like last time? Why isn't my cell working properly?  Ad infinitum. We do the same thing for dying.

 Dying is not scary.  Most of us have moved through it many  times;  some of us hundreds of times.

 

 The Angels chuckle at our foreboding.  They say if we could  just allow ourselves to relax, to accept that we are never  alone no matter how life appears,  our entire life in the body  would be so much easier.  We wouldn't be creating walls of    resistance at every turn. Instead we would glide through our  lives like the otter slides into the pond. With a joie de vivre we  would giggle and wiggle our way through every bump and  splash . 

 Once again we are given the opportunity to trust that all is well.  Quantum Physics points out energy continues. Could that mean that we have always been here in some shape or form, in and out of space and time?  Maybe we just decided to morph into human form for the fun of experiencing life within the constrictions of a body, just to see what it feels like to squeeze our energy into a five or six foot frame?

When it's time to release the body, we are given the delightful opportunity of playing the otter and sliding down on our butts once again to join our friends whom we left on the other shore.  We will shortly realize that no one was left behind. We are all together; but on this side, we're wearing blinders. On the dead side, we're no longer blindfolded. We're holding hands, frolicking together in the Light. 

The Process of Dying

A hospice nurse suggested I ask the Angels about the process of dying a normal, not accidental, death. 

The Angels offer these thoughts...

There are as many ways to cross over as there are people's lifestyles. We all have a little different way of perceiving and acting on the planet. However, there are patterns of letting go of the body. Just as in life, some people embrace every experience and jump right in with gusto; others flat out refuse to budge, or are quietly resistant. By the time they make up their mind to move forward, the rest of us have lost our enthusiasm.  

Moving into death is the same.  There are those who put their head on the pillow and close their eyes. Then there are those who spend years in a partial state of life-death, a state of limbo, neither fully alive nor fully dead.  It is a question not just of receptivity, but also life lessons. It can have to do with unseen challenges set up by and for us before entering the body. 

Some of us hold on tightly and spend months, even years in the process. Some families won't let go, or the dying may be concerned about their family's welfare. Some of the dying hold on because of their self-imposed position as guardian and choose to maintain that position after death.

Your beliefs can expedite or prolong your passing.  It also depends on how the people around you are experiencing your dying. Some are holding on tightly and willing you to stay. Sometimes people are afraid to leave, concerned that perhaps the teachings of their religion were not correct; or that Jesus or their God won't accept them; or that they failed someone important in their life, or worse yet, that they failed themselves and are worried about what will happen when they die.

Some are so confused about their personal experience of going to the other side in their dream state, that they don't know what bags to pack, what to do, and which train to board. They look for proof to validate their experience because they don't understand that the rules of the body no longer apply.

There is no right way or wrong way to die. The judgment that we live with on this side comes from the ego of the body.  The Divine has no judgment. One way is not better than another; they are just different. 

"On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done just as easily lying down."  ~Woody Allen

Dad in the Afterlife helping Mom return Home

Mom has Cancer. Her daughter asks if Dad can help her from the Other Side.

The Angels show me Mom's body is slowing down. She's beginning to step out of her body unconsciously.  She appears to be sleeping, but what she experiences is she and Dad are resting on the couch, drawing energy from each other.   He's holding her hand. 

The daughter indicates they were were close.  Even when she's uncomfortable or in pain, Mom's not ready to let go yet. It's time for all of you who love her, to tell her how much she means to you and prepare yourself for her moving on. She will welcome both the love from you and transitioning into the next phase of her life. 

What holds her here is her desire to make everything right for all of you. Dad can't prevent her from dying, but he can make the process easier for her by being the anchor of safety he's been through many lifetimes.

The Angels teach that if we closed our eyes and allowed ourselves    to see beyond our sense of separation, we could see more beings    of light than stars. Think of the stars as someone you love today or    yesterday, or have loved in other lifetimes.  These lights are our  families, our friends, our lovers as well as our enemies. In some lifetime, perhaps many centuries ago, we acted as they did, both  good and bad.

 In reality, what appears as tragedy, is a joyous occasion.  On the  Other Side, the event of death of the body is a welcoming home, a  celebration of returning to the freedom of spirit and a more readily  apparent connection with the Divine. 

 Your Angels whisper, "Breathe deeply, my love. You're here. You're  safe. We love you. You are one of us."

Psychic Mediums? They claim to be able to talk to the dead.

Yahoo's Ask for an Answer, which I can't seem to link to, has a blogger who insists that all Mediums and Psychics are scam artists. From my viewpoint, A Medium can't be a Medium without being psychic.  As for scammers, they are in every profession, from the ice cream guy selling drugs from his truck to a president promising one thing and doing the opposite behind closed doors.

For me, the talking with the dead experience came to me, and not me to it. I am still not able to tell you the love names you called each other, or secret places where someone hid the spoils. Lottery numbers either.  That doesn't mean that someone else might not be totally accurate in these endeavors, but it is not my purpose. 

 My focus comes from the overview of the higher  consciousness of the Angels. My purpose is to share the  connection between our "dead" and the alive, to show that not  only does life continue, but both sides can still interact to help  each other. It's all about Love.

 Terah Cox, in her book, "Birth Angels:  Fulfilling your Life Purpose with the 72 Angels of the Kabbalah, explains the    Angels' function perfectly:  

 "... the Angels connect us to the energies of the Divine by    using the metaphor of the step-down transformer - an electrical  device (the Angels) that decreases a high-voltage source (the Divine) so that it can be plugged into a lower voltage receptor (the human).  Conversely, when we invoke, pray, or appeal to the Divine, the Angels serve as "amplifiers" to transmit our seemingly small and finite communication to the vast and infinite Divine."

It's a wise thing to be skeptical.  My skepticism of the Angels left once I learned to deliberately call in and listen to the Angels. What they say is always loving, never harmful, never hurtful.  The information does not come from me. Trust me. I am not that evolved. 

 

"Birth Angels: Fulfilling your Life Purpose with the 72 Angels of the Kabbalah

Life without Limits

Grandma Jean passed on several years ago.  Her loving granddaughter, Anne,  wanted to see how she was doing. 

Grandma Jean didn't send a rush of energy up my leg. She wanted to meet with her granddaughter, but didn't understand the procedure.  More than that, she was brought up to stand back, to be a little shy. She had been rewarded in life for her feminine behavior of supporting others.

Her granddaughter, Anne opened her heart wide, and with a blast of trumpets to make us laugh, the Angels unfurled Oscar-red carpet, rolling all the way over to Grandma Jean. Angels surrounded her on both sides and together they glided over. Grandma opened her arms and with a huge smile of delight at both her feat and in seeing Anne, hugged her granddaughter.  It was a lovely and loving moment. 

When Anne asked how her Grandma was doing, the Angels shared some useful information, for Anne's current living situation as well as for Grandma Jean. Grandma is just fine, but she imagines there are many things she can't do. She hasn't allowed herself to stretch out, to open to her new life without limits. She's kept her energy in close as she learned to do in life. 

 The Angels said it is time to expand, to open to so much    more than what she thinks of as her life. She's been living  as a budding rose, when all along she could have opened to her magnificent self, full-blown and experiencing every breeze  in the sunlight. 

 After we had closed the session, Grandma Jean appeared as  a young woman, in shorts and Keds, white socks folded over  neatly at her ankles, feet up on the railing of the porch. She  was anything but a grandma.  Young and lovely, she was  filled with the expectancy of a beautiful summer day with her  friends. 

The Ghost in the Window

On a weekend jaunt, Harris snapped a photo of an old European-style coffee house. Later he and his friend, Lynn, noticed a figure in the upstairs window. The enlarged photo showed an anguished-appearing woman with outstretched arms, seemingly crying for release. She looked surreal. She was not a mannequin. When questioned later, the coffee shop owners indicated that on occasion, visitors had seen a female spirit glide by. 

The entrapped spirit we'll call Iris, seemed overcome with sadness and terror from what the Angels said was a life of abuse. When asked, she wanted to be moved into the Light but was too depleted to do so on her own.

What happened next was exhilarating. Keep in mind that what I'm sharing here is a way to explain the unexplainable to our linear minds. Three Angels surrounded and supported her, wrapping their wings and energy around her spirit. We three humans aligned our hearts spiritually with the Divine and the imprisoned spirit, Iris. We were the necessary earth connection to enable Iris' Angels to carry her into the Light. 

Alzheimer's Disease

Today a Granddaughter and I enjoyed a visit with her dead Grandmother from the old country.  She had led a challenging life of hardship and abuse. She was often treated without respect or even a guiding hand. She learned to be self-reliant, to hide her grief, and to cover her back. Through all of this she lived in her heart.

As her life drew to a close she developed Alzheimer's Disease. The gradual disintegration of her brain cells appeared disastrous to her observing family.  Her Angels say it was a gift. She had learned to tread cautiously in life, because she had experienced loss of children, of home, and of friends and family many times over.

 Alzheimer's left her half in this world and half in another. She  would leave her body to search for a safe space with those  she loved and trusted, and found they were searching for her  as well. Often she would stay in this "altered space" that  caused her "alive" family to think she was out of her mind.  The opposite was true.   She was in her mind and out of her  body. Gradually she became more comfortable out of her  body than in, and chose to leave. 

 We honor her with love in her much-deserved peace.

 

See you on the Other Side...

My friend, David, is a deeply spiritual man. His Dad died in 1996.  Two nights ago he dreamt that Dad was driving and he was in the passenger seat beside him. Here's David's dream:

"We were on a treacherous road, thousands of feet up in the mountains, with the precipice on my side of the car. Sure enough, Dad drove off the road, and for one terrifying moment, I believed we were going to die. Then we looked at each other and grinned while we fell off the mountain. I said, 'See you on the other side...' That's all I remember."

  The dead, when asked, often confess to having that moment    of fear.  It's a kind of,  "Oh my gosh!  This is it!"  It seems

   to occur before they relax into the dying process.  Once the      spirit sloughs the body, the freedom of living without 

   physical challenges recreates the memory of being "Home."       

    

   

A Joyful Reunion into the Spirit Life

There's an empty lot about a mile from me where there used to be a swimming pool that was used for diving instruction.  The pool was dismantled and filled in because of a few too many accidents, including the last one in which a young boy, as I recall about six, was taking a class. He was pulled down through the force of the water swirling into the drain and died there.  It was a good five years ago. 

The old pool site is on my way to the beach. I pass it often. For years I've noticed that there is a sadness that overtakes me when I drive by.  I've learned to pray for peace for the little boy's soul.

Yesterday I was walking by the pool lot on the way to have coffee with a friend. As I walked by, I could feel the energy of this little boy.  The ongoing grief of those who loved him, along with his own confusion, prevented him from releasing all of his energy from this spot. Part of him was still stuck there. I paused for a minute and asked him if he wanted me to help him move completely into the Light. It was a definite affirmative. 

 Waiting for my friend to arrive for coffee, I asked the boy's High Self  permission to move him into the Light. His "other-side" friends and Angels  extended their hands of light out to him and pulled him to them. They created  a magnetic pull which enabled him to leave the whirlpool of energy that  literally, drained his life from him.

 I left this little boy, who now showed me a vibrant young man,  surrounded      within the joyful reunion of his friends. Together they were preparing a  celebration for his total re-entry into his spirit life.